Take a deep breath and count to ten

I have a bad temper.

This might be a surprising statement for those who have only known me a couple of years but anyone who has known me longer is probably standing there, or rather sitting there, nodding their head in agreement. It wasn't until I started working that I realised I really needed to rein my temper in (basically, you see other people in the office with a bad temper and you realise that you don't want to be that person). It took me a couple of years but I think I have managed to do a good job of controlling it in most cases. I guess the proof will be in whether my more recent friends think I'm a good natured guy or not...

Anyway, despite the above, I very nearly lost my temper this morning.

This happened on the MTR on the way to work at Hong Kong station. Hong Kong station is basically at the end of the Tung Chung line so everybody gets off the train at the same time on this station - which can be particularly pleasant during rush hour...

What normally happens is that everybody tries to file out at the same time so you get a small measure of people bumping into each other. However, on a semi-regular basis, someone will get a bit more aggressive and try to nudge you out of the way instead of just bumping up against you. Whenever this happens, I generally try to stand firm - I'm not going to get out of your way simply because you try and push me out of the way (quick social commentary - in my experience, its generally women who try to do this - why is that?). If you can nudge or barge me out of the way, then I will generally take my lumps and "let" you pass. And when I say barge, I really do mean barge. Believe it or not, this has happened to me - a smallish woman once took a two step run and barged me out of the way - I was so surprised that I couldn't help but laugh which got me the evil eye from her.

On the morning in question (ie this morning), on the way out of the train, the above happened as per normal. A woman tries to push me out of the way as we exit the train. As per usual, I don't deliberately let her pass and she wasn't strong enough to push me out of the way. However, after getting out of the train, the woman runs around me and just as she passes me, she deliberately shoulders me (not to get in front of me but just for the sake of barging me) and tries to elbow me in the ribs at the same time (she missed with the elbow).

I'm ashamed to say I reacted and nudged her back. Not the most adult of reactions but there you go - that's who I am. She obviously didn't like this and again, she shoulders me and tries to elbow me. Again, she misses with the elbow (btw, she kept missing because there was a fundamental problem with her technique - she would shoulder me and then try to elbow me by which time its too late - what you need to do is elbow at the same time as the barge - in effect, leading with the elbow instead of the shoulder). At this point, I lost it. I balled my fist and was just about to smack her (an actual punch and not just a push) when she got onto the escalator. That meant that I had to pause for a second in order to adjust my aim (I didn't want to punch her in the ass). That extra second was just enough to give me pause and I managed to cool down enough so I was able to just ignore the woman instead.

But I was that close to punching her (and I mean punches instead of just pushing someone). Its actually really scary how close I came to physically assaulting a woman. Disregarding how shameful it is to assault a woman, the only outcome would have been me in a jail cell. Not particularly appealing.

So, what happened? How come I lost my temper - after all, its not the first time someone has barged into me?

Looking back on the event (using my amateur psychology glasses), it was a combination of two things which set me off:

1) She didn't shoulder charge me for the purpose of getting in front of me - she did it for the purpose of attacking me.
2) She also tried to elbow me - again, this could only have been for the purpose of attacking me.

Both of these actions are in the nature of attacks against me. Compare this with the other situation above where a smallish woman took two running steps and barged me out of the way. In the other situation, the smallish woman, although rude, was still focused on getting past me. Nothing personal as it were - I just happened to be the sap who was in her way.

However, the situation this morning was completely different. The woman this morning was attacking me rather than just trying to get past me. That made it personal. My guess is that my mind treated it as self defence rather than assault (the "hey, she attacked me first" defence!) which was why I went straight into fisty-fisty mode.

Don't get me wrong - I'm not trying to justify my actions. What I did was shameful. I should have just ignored the woman after she first tried to elbow me instead of escalating the issue by pushing her back. In addition, my response of fisticuffs was completely incommensurate to the offence. However, now that I know why, hopefully, I can better control myself in future if the situation ever repeats itself.

iPhone? No - just no

I was having lunch with a colleague today and we were talking shop. As it was over lunch, I didn't have a notebook with me so I pulled out my phone and used it to take a couple of notes. When he saw the keyboard, he asked me which phone it was and then asked me why I didn't use an iPhone.

Why is it that everyone seems to think that the iPhone is the bee's f$&king knees?

Maybe its just me but although the iPhone does some things right, there are some absolutely shockingly bad moves by Apple which really just rub me the wrong way. So, rather than explaining to people the next time they ask me, I figured that I would put some of the reasons I dislike the iPhone into a blog post and then just send this link to them in future.

iPhone provider
The first thing about the iPhone which severely cheeses me off is that I am forced to use the telecom provider as dictated by Apple. In US, this means AT&T. In HK, this means 3. Guess what - I choose which telco I use and I will NOT have this dictated to me by some tinpot tech dictator.

Yeah, I know that the iPhone has been cracked and that I could choose another provider. However, why the f$&k should I have to go to all that trouble just to use a phone!

iPhone security (or lack thereof)
The iPhone has a shocking lack of security which has been well documented online. Basically, ALL applications on the iPhone run at the root level which means the app has full system access (granted - you could think of this as a plus as it allowed people to crack the iPhone for use on other networks).

Another issue is that its not as if Apple are taking security concerns seriously as the new iPhone 3G still suffers from security issues.

Apple sucks
The last point I want to make here is that Apple, as a company, sucks. The level of hypocrisy from Apple is just astounding.

A good example of this is the iPhone app store. There was a recent firestorm of criticism of iPhone over how they handled Nine Inch Nail app which you can read about here. And more recently, they banned an ebook reader because it gave access to a public domain book about sex. Granted, Apple reversed their decision after another shitstorm of criticism but it is worth mentioning that this only happened after a shitstorm of criticism.

The fact is that Apple and hypocrisy seem to go hand in hand. Just go into google and type in Apple hypocrisy and marvel at the number of hits. You could also do this for other companies and many of them won't have the same number of hits. As an example, I tried microsoft and it had less hits. That's right folks! The "evil" microsoft is apparently less of a hypocrite than Apple - draw your own conclusions.

Also, considering that Apple are lobbying to make it illegal for people to install software on their iPhone outside of the Apple app store, does anyone really want their iPhone to be completely reliant on Apple. Or as BoingBoing puts it:

"It's amazing to think that in 2009 a phone manufacturer wants to dictate which literature its customers should be allowed to download and read on their devices."

Doctor drills a hole in boys head

Despite the macabre sounding title, this is a fantastic story.

Basically, some kid in Australia fell down while riding his bike. Although he seemed alright, his mom (who is a nurse) noticed a bump on his head and took him to the local hospital. Lucky for the kid, he had a smart mum as by the time they got to the hospital, the kid was slipping in and out of consciousness.

The problem was that the kid had a blood clot in his head but the local hospital didn't have the equipment or a qualified expert to operate on him. However, with the pressure mounting, there wasn't time to do anything else.

Faced with a dearth of options, Doctor Rob Carson obtained an ordinary household drill and called a neurosurgeon. The neurosurgeon talked him through the procedure over the phone and Dr. Carson then drilled a hole into the kids head to let out the blood clot.

The kid is alive and appears to be recovering nicely from the ordeal.

This is an incredible story and a great piece of doctoring despite the doctor being pretty blase about the whole thing (he said "it is just a part of the job").

Gordon - 4 months old and growing fast

Gordon is now 4 months old and growing fast - both up and out. As you can see from the latest photo's, he is quite rotund (but in an oh so cute way!).


This is a rare photo opportunity for me. Nowadays, whenever I hold him, he tends to start crying. Not really sure why.


Ahem. As I was saying, whenever I hold him, he tends to start crying. :(


But until he starts to cry, you can see that he has the cutest little smile. What's great about his smile is that whenever you smile at him, he will smile right back at you. He started doing this at just two months believe it or not.


He also has big eyes, just like his older brother and mother. His eyelashes aren't as long as Gerry's though so I suspect he won't be as good a looking kid as his brother.


Still plenty cute enough for me though. :)

Stranger than fiction

The funniest thing happened to me on Sunday (ha - I bet you thought this post would be about the movie!).

The missus and I decided to take Gordon out rather than having him cooped up at home all the time. We decided to go to Elements, the big shopping mall at Kowloon station. The main reason for this is that the shopping mall currently has a great deal on parking where we could effectively park for free with just a little spending. Naturally, we decided to take full advantage of this promotion by staying there all day ...

By the time it got to late afternoon, I was quite tired so we decided to take a quick rest on one of the sofa's in the shopping mall. While the missus looked after the baby, I closed my eyes to take a quick nap.

"Ooh, look! This baby is quite fat!"

This came from a female voice quite close by. Seeing as Gordon is indeed quite big, I guessed that the speaker was talking about my boy and so I opened my eyes. Sure enough, there is a lady looking down at Gordon and talking to the missus.

"How old is he?" she asked to which the missus replied "Four months."

"Ooh, our baby is five months." she said before turning to the guy next to her and saying, "look, he's smiling at me!".

At this point, she turns around and starts to leave. Just before they go, I flick a glance at the baby but don't really get a good view as I was sitting down. I then flick a glance at the guy for whom I can only see the profile as he isn't looking at me and then I close my eyes and go back to sleep.

Two seconds later, I bolt upright and ask the missus "Was that Duncan?" (names changed to protect the innocent!).

"Who?" She asked.

"Duncan Lee. You know, that colleague of ours."

"I don't know," she said, "I don't know him."

We got up and wandered around the mall to see if we could find him again but he and the lady had disappeared. As soon as I got back to the office, I got in touch with Duncan to confirm. Sure enough, that was him.

In effect, his wife (who I and the missus don't know) met and talked to my wife (who he and his missus doesn't know) and this all happened while Duncan and I were right there and neither of us noticed the other!

After this, I will never joke about how ridiculous the coincidences in modern chick flicks are!

Chart Throb

I recently finished reading Chart Throb by Ben Elton. This is the 3rd novel by Ben Elton that I've read and although it wasn't as good as his other stuff, its still a well written story and a brilliant parody of "reality" tv shows.

The story centres around Calvin Simms who is the creator and judge of Chart Throb. Chart Throb is a reality tv show focused on finding the next big pop star and Calvin is basically the mean and nasty judge on the panel (i.e. a parody of Simon Cowell). Calvin's wife wants to divorce him and take half his fortune but in a brilliant move by Calvin, he gets her to agree to a bet where she can name any ringer she likes and he will ensure that person wins the upcoming season of Chart Throb.

This starts a brilliant series of manipulations by Calvin to not only make sure that the ringer wins the show, but to do it in such a way that the viewing public is not aware of the manipulation (which would cause the ratings to plummet and hence his bet to be forfeit). I say "brilliant" but for Calvin, its all old hat as the show has never been about finding the next big pop star as Calvin repeatedly mentions throughout the book. What the show is actually about is finding a compelling and entertaining story to tell on tv - and nothing is more entertaining than watching a parade of mingers, blingers and clingers.

Mingers, blingers and clingers is the term that Calvin uses to pigeonhole the contestants. Mingers are contestants who are woeful in every sense of the word, blingers are people who are just there to show off and clingers are people who desperately want to be successful. The first thing you note is that an ability to sing never comes up when Calvin judges who will be contestants.

Ben Elton really lets his imagination run wild here in creating the various mingers, blingers and clingers. Equally brilliant are the various ways that Calvin manipulates things to ensure that he gets an entertaining mix of contestants while also making sure that the ringer wins. Obviously, I'm giving reality tv shows the benefit of the doubt here by assuming that the contents of the book are all a result of Ben's imagination!!

Despite the high praise though, the ending of the book is a bit anti-climactic. Having said that, I've been thinking about alternative endings and I really couldn't think of anything better. Ultimately, I guess the nature of the subject, and possbily how the story developed, limits how you can end the book. Although I have to give credit to Ben Elton for the way he ultimately ended the story (as I said, I couldn't think of anything better), it still felt anti-climactic and my impression at the moment I finished the novel was "oh, that's it?".

Still - a very worthy read if you have time and particularly if you like reality tv shows.

"I'm the best there is at what I do ...

... but what I do isn't very nice."

And with that line, the true believers among you will know that this blog post is about Wolverine.

"I'm the best there is at what I do, but what I do best isn't very nice."

And with that line, the X-Men Origins Wolverine movie craps all over Wolvie fans as it get's Logan's famous catchphrase wrong.

In case you hadn't guessed, I went to see the new Wolverine movie yesterday with the missus (don't worry, this blog post is spoiler free). By now, you probably know that the critics crapped all over this movie. And in some respects, I kinda understand why. The plot is average and the dialogue is mediocre and cliched. Basically, the new Marvel movie is your everyday Summer blockbuster.

But here's the thing. This is a movie about a guy with attitude who is indestructible and has adamantium claws coming out of his hands. Let's just say that I wasn't expecting Jane Austen. The only thing that this movie had to do right was to make sure there were loads of scenes of Wolverine kicking ass - and it delivered.

Yes, the movie had a predictable storyline. Sure, the dialogue was cliched. And so what if they took liberties with decades of established history (which superhero movie doesn't?). The key thing is that there were loads of big explosions, flashy CGI and butts were liberally kicked.

Whether you like this movie or not will depend on two things. First - can you ignore decades of established Wolverine history? Second - Can you ignore minor things like plot and treat the movie like a collection of Wolvie fight scenes? If you answered yes to both of the above, then go ahead as the movie is worth watching.

PS Smeg me but Hugh Jackman is buffed!

Some random thoughts

I'm back from Phuket and, boy, do I feel bloated! All I have done the last week is lounge around like a lazy b'stad and constantly stuff my face with food.

And it was totally awesome!!

The downside is that my mind still isn't functioning properly so this blog post is gonna be a bit random.

By the way, the missus and I stayed at the Amari Coral Beach Resort. While the hotel was okay, I don't think that I would go back. While the view from the hotel was pretty nifty, the hotel is just a bit too remote for my liking.

Loads of TV to catch up on now I'm back. The second season of Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles has just finished and it really ended with a bang - what a fantastic way to end the season. I really hope it doesn't get cancelled. On that note, I'm really starting to enjoy Dollhouse as well. I hope Fox doesn't get cancel that show either. If both shows get cancelled, I will have nothing left but my sad face.
:(

Which reminds me, while in Phuket, we went to The Cream & Fudge Factory a couple of times. Good ice cream - particularly how its mixed with other stuff on a frozen marble slab to make a custom concoction. The video on the front page of the website gives you a good idea of what to expect. Currently, in HK, there is a similar company called "iscream" but having looked at the shop, it really doesn't look anywhere near as good. Shame there isn't a branch of The Cream & Fudge Factory in HK.

Last of all, I came home to find that Wizards of the Coast have made the DnD 4e quick start guide and the full module of Keep on the Shadowfell available as a free download on their website. How cool is that! The idea, obviously, is for people to try the game and if they like it, then they can invest in the full game. I say "try the game" but there is enough content in the module (71 pages!!) to last several sessions.

Now all I need are some friends to play with...